October 1918

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Victory had bestowed a crown of thorns upon my head, sweltering underneath that desert sun; a sentence of agony that had been extended to the gates of Aleppo. I had achieved our victory in Damascus, before the Arab chieftains, and their new government, but this war refused to relinquish its grasp over my life.

The Arab Revolt was perhaps the most infamous deception among all deceptions throughout the Great War. The British had promised Sharif Hussein of Mecca support for an independent Arab state if he were to assist in military efforts against his overlord, the Ottoman Empire. Sharif Hussein, already at odds with Caliph⁸ Mehmed V's call for jihad against the Entente⁹, was willing to raise the flag of rebellion across the Hejaz.

I was sent to Sharif Hussein from my post at the Arab Bureau¹⁰, to assist in these efforts. Sharif Hussein bin Ali had four princes under his dynasty: Prince Ali; Prince Abdullah; Prince Faisal; and Prince Zeid; who were all responsible for our victory in this rebellion. I had been assigned primarily to assist Prince Faisal, the one I found to be the most capable of leading this movement.

However, there was never an intention on the part of Britain to bind itself to this promise. Mark Sykes and François Georges-Picot had struck a private agreement between Britain and France to divide up the Ottomans among themselves and the Russians, before the Bolshevik Revolution¹¹ publicly revealed this plan. All the regions of the peninsula, from Syria to Yemen, would merely change masters from Ottoman Muslims to European Christians, a ghastly prospect for the Arab people, but not as offensive to them as handing Palestine over to the Zionists.¹²

I had not been aware of these prior deceits, and fully believed in my soul the righteousness of my work in liberating a people under subjugation for the last half-millennium. When the mountain of lies and falsehoods were known to me, my mind was split between two allegiances: the arbitrary crown of my homeland, and the obligation of righteousness to the Arab cause. I resolved to walk the line between these two polarities, by allowing the Arabs so great a victory over the Ottomans that the Allied Powers would be forced to concede, if not all, some of their territorial promises. This required endless mental suffering, as I could not tell my full intentions to either side, knowing the integrity of this adventure required that balance to be maintained, until at last, we had won.

At the moment, that seemed to be the case. I was to be free of the struggles and could sojourn onward to England, but much like this conflict, that notion seemed as much an illusion. I have undergone a metamorphosis in this desert: I walked over the rivers of blood, felt the lashes of capricious cruelty, and have enabled this lie of guaranteed freedom to flourish over the hopes and dreams of those Arabs yearning for their earthly Paradise. The man I was before is no longer the one who I am today.

As I prepared to depart with Prince Faisal to France for the Peace Conference, I contemplated the meaning of our victory. Arabia has been restored from the sands of time; this kingdom of the desert, ruled by a people emancipated from their conquerors. The Ottoman Empire now lies vanquished, driven from Arabia, by tribal warriors embarking to mark their legacy upon history. Truly, big things have small beginnings.

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In those early days of the revolt, I had freed the city of Aqaba¹³ on the Red Sea from Ottoman hands, granting Prince Faisal and the Sharifian Army their authority in the eyes of the British military command. Damascus, the capital of Syria, was the crown jewel of our mission, the successful capture of which our success rested upon. It was here where the Arab tribal chieftains were to form the provisional government, with permission from my superior officer, General Allenby. He was in control of Anglo-Egyptian forces, capturing Palestine during our war efforts, and who subsequently denied me my request for a leave of the war theatre.

The hour of our great triumph was marked with equally stunning developments from the rest of the Middle East. Jabal Shammar, whose raiders we had had to deal with during our expeditions toward Syria, had conquered their rival power Nejd, led by the strict Wahhabist¹⁴ Ibn Saud. Jabal Shammar's emir, Abdullah Mut'ib, was in the pocket of the Ottomans, and was now threatening to launch invasions from the interior of Central Arabia towards the coasts.

More menacingly, the Druze, followers of a mystical and heterodox school of Shia Islam, had attempted to join Emir Abd el-Kader, the grandson of the famous Algerian leader, in overthrowing the Arab government council. Damascus sustained more damage from this uprising than any previous fighting in the city with the Ottomans, and several chieftains were slain on its battlefield. The surviving Arab fighters managed to push the Druze soldiers and Abd el-Kader out of the city before my contingent of men could return to the capital.

We moved quickly to banish Abd el-Kader, and his Druze mercenaries, from residing in any territories under Arabia. I felt resolved to lead a cavalry charge to finish the traitors off, but more pressing matters came to light. News had come from Mecca that Sharif Hussein passed away, succumbing to a heart attack after being hospitalized for chest pain two days prior. We at once moved to declare Prince Ali the new head of our Arab government, and Prince Faisal the King of Syria.

Prince Abdullah was preparing to move his fighters towards the Transjordan¹⁵ region, in the event our British compatriots should intend to double-cross us, or the French should attempt a surprise invasion of Syria. Prince Zeid stationed his forces in Medina, a major Islamic religious city located in the interior of Hejaz, which had been recently conquered by him after the last Ottoman soldiers surrendered, facing a deficit of equipment and supplies from the blown-to-hell Hejaz railway.¹⁶ Prince Ali remained in Mecca, organizing his father's military and civil command there.

We later received word Jabal Shammar offered Abd el-Kader asylum from our Arab military. This was a catastrophic development for many reasons, the primary danger being that Jabal Shammar was making no secret of their intentions to unite the peninsula under their empowered rule. The success of their conquest against Nejd has not only made Emir Mut'ib delusional, but a security threat to the Hejaz. War would be unavoidable at this rate, and the prospect of waging another desert campaign would surely drive me to insanity, more so than it has already.

November 1918 ― July 1919

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The Ottoman Empire is a mediæval relic from over 400 years ago, the political remnants of the Seljuks.²⁰ The Ottomans had conquered vast regions of land, spreading wealth and prestige across their growing kingdom. Once Jerusalem and Mecca fell under their own authority, the Sultan wasted no time declaring his state an Islamic caliphate. The Ottomans envisioned their empire as a peaceful garden of faiths, borrowing from civic and religious traditions left behind from precursor nations. Though enjoying great success for centuries adhering to this model, this approach to governing became fatally detrimental in the post-Enlightenment age.

The Ottomans efforts at modernization inadvertently sparked nationalist sentiments against the minority Turkish rule over its majority non-Turkish populace. Attempts to instil a national identity backfired as citizens chose instead to identify with their own ethnicities over becoming Ottoman. The Balkans were the first to break themselves away from Ottoman authority, followed by Libya in their war with Italy.²¹ Now, thanks to our efforts, the Arabs in Hejaz; Syria; Mesopotamia²²; Lebanon; Palestine; and Transjordan were granted their independence at last.

When our Arab delegation arrived at the Peace Conference, we were debriefed by British representatives on the situation developing in the Ottoman Empire as a result of our war. The Three Pashas, the callous dictators leading the Ottoman government, had declared they would stand and fight back against any Allied invasion of Anatolia. Unfortunately for the Pashas, they did not expect their figurehead, Caliph Mehmed VI, attempting to dismiss them from their positions.

Mustafa Kemal Pasha attempted to storm the General Assembly building with a contingency of nationalist soldiers, but his forces were pushed back by a division of janissaries²³ protecting Constantinople.²⁴ Though his coup failed, his actions sparked a nationwide revolt against the Pashas. Following the government's collapse, Britain; Italy; France; Greece; and Armenia decided to begin occupying the country, under the guise of protecting the Christian minority from the civil strife. Though I do not doubt the Christians who remain in Ottoman territory are welcoming their new colonial masters' efforts at subjugation, this pretext merely serves to obfuscate the desire for territorial expansion.

The Special Organization, the Ottoman's intelligence apparatus, had been actively sabotaging the military operations of the European Powers and Nationalist Turkey. Reports were starting to emerge from Arab Bureau speculating on the presence of an elite division of the Organization using "strange counterintelligence operations" against the Allies bearing the name Yildiz²⁵, the very same one established, and thought later abolished, by the late Abdulhamid II.²⁶ The lesson of Turkey is a warning to our ambitions; our own Arab nation must avoid falling into a similar fate.

January ― July 1919

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We failed to prevent the Europeans claiming vasts swaths of our caliphate, and so we were preparing to head back to Damascus to debrief the National Council on the impending war, and I feared, the end of an independent Arabia. The French would forcefully depose Prince Faisal from Syria, and the British would be prepared to subjugate the Arabs under their own mandate. The hour of darkness had fallen upon Arabia.

During the Conference, Jabal Shammar had launched a surprise invasion of Mecca, capturing the city, and slaying Prince Ali. He had chosen to defend the city to the last man, dying in battle against the Shammar soldiers led by our old enemy Abd el-Kader, and his Druze militants. Apparently, Emir Mut'ib had been deposed by Abd el-Kader shortly after arriving in Ha'il weeks earlier. The zealous Druze, empowered by their benefactor, began subjugating thousands of tribesmen by force. Those that resisted their rule were branded heretics and exiled.

A refugee crisis had opened along the Mesopotamian border, and the occupying British forces were being stretched to their limits in managing the social upheaval. Prince Abdullah arrived in Damascus two days prior with his men, preparing to defend the city should Jabal Shammar launch further attacks on the capital. Abdullah was offered the caliphal title but declined, offering it instead to Prince Faisal, who wielded more political authority over the Arab tribes than his remaining brothers.

In the midst of this storm of agony, I ran into a gentlemen on the Peace Conference floor sitting in a chair, who I initially believed was a member of the press, as he was writing intensely into a journal that he was carrying with him.²⁹ I had glanced quickly at his notes as I walked by before stopping in my tracks when I could see that his notes were not filled with words, but with symbols in some sort of cypher.

The gentlemen must have noticed my presence, as he began to look up from his notebook and turn towards me. I politely joked that his editor would have a difficult time understanding his notes, to which he replied, "History should not be forgotten. You should know this, your actions have helped shape it, and your name will be emblazed across it, but it is not finished with you just yet, Lawrence." The gentlemen returned to his notes, and I departed with the rest of the Arab delegation, pondering the meaning of his mysterious divination to me.

Once we were back in Damascus, we had to prepare for a war on multiple fronts. French soldiers were mobilizing for their occupation of Syria, while the British were weighing their own military commitments. Resisting the French alone would have been daunting, if nearly impossible due to our own lack of proper military equipment. I advised Prince Faisal to open up negotiations with Britain over the future of Arab-British relations. This would buy us time, and provide diplomatic cover for any defensive resistance against France.

Prince Zeid, who had been stationed in Medina, was ordered to retake Mecca. Imam Yahya Muhammad, our nominal Zaidi Shia ally in Yemen who joined the Revolt early on, was willing to assist in the fight to retake Mecca from the "heretical" Druze. I know that if I should perish defending Arabia, I shall come to know that eternal peace of mind that has long alluded me; for to invent a message and then, with open eyes, give oneself for it, is greater than heroics, it is the meaning of the Cross. The fate of Prince Faisal's kingdom became my burden once again.

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General Allenby had been instrumental in convincing his superiors on the sincerity of Caliph Faisal's negotiations, bringing us much needed relief on the diplomatic front. The French unilaterally pressed on with their invasion from the port of Beirut. During our conquest of Syria, we had planned for French sympathies arising in Lebanon, and so went ahead to fortify positions around the region with armed guerrilla fighters sympathetic to our cause. With the help of the Arab populace, we routed the invading army and cut off their supply from the Mediterranean ports.

After holding out in the Christian cities and towns in Lebanon, we forced the French to capitulation, allowing their army to retreat into British-occupied Palestine. The Sharifian Army has won an undeniable victory against the French, and with that, the salvation of the caliphate. The streets of Damascus erupted into celebration, thousands cheering the name of Faisal, who had won the right to be called caliph in this trial of fire. I must admit, the march of progress had brought light into my clouded mind, but even with this triumph, war with Britain would be unavoidable. The British would never relinquish their claims over Mesopotamia or Palestine to us, much less the state of Egypt or other Muslim colonies.

Prince Abdullah, riding from the battle on his white stallion, was directed to move into Lebanon to reinforce the port cities, specifically the strategic city of Tripoli. Prince Zeid had last reported his forces were on the outskirts of Mecca, preparing to retake the religious center of Arabia. Prince Faisal, sitting inside the National Council chamber, turned to me, and directed me to put an end to Jabal Shammar by invading through the North. I made clear to him of my intentions to return to England before being court-marshalled, causing Faisal to laugh at my protests.

"If it should satisfy your superiors, Lawrence, I would gladly serve under your authority. You can stay here in Damascus while I take the head of Emir el-Kader." I replied, "A Christian running the Arabian Caliphate is a greater lie than even I can make credible." Faisal merely replied, "Don't sell yourself short, Lawrence, your skills are second-to-none. Why, if it weren't for your half-truths before this war, perhaps our freedom may have never come to us now." With our pleasantries ended, I departed into the desert, perhaps for the last time.

We established our camp at Wadi Rum, where I decided to climb up the rock formation to get a better look at the valley below. The emancipation of the Arabs was no longer a vision, it had taken form on Earth; Prince Faisal was the chosen one to bring forth this light left shattered in history. At his side, I became the arbiter of justice against the sin of Ottoman rule staining these pristine lands, the bringer of its self-destruction. Let it be known, the unthinkable and the improbable are never the impossible; nothing is written.

August ― December 1919

NOTE: The following events do not correspond to any historical equivalency.

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We had occupied the city of Tabuk in Jabal Shammar when we had finally received further news from Mecca. Prince Zeid and our Yemen allies retook the holy city after a fierce street-by-street battle. The Druze had left parts of the capital unrecognizable, using sorcery and other forms of mysticism that I cannot understand to reshape the city. Strange symbols were found marked on various religious centers and government offices.

The capture of Mecca strengthened our resolve to bring justice upon the heads of Emir el-Kader and the Druze extremists. Our army thundered into the heart of Jabal Shammar, where Arab inhabitants welcomed our arrival, seeing us as liberators from Emir el-Kader's reign of terror. We had even encountered Druze refugees who declared their empowered brethren in Ha'il "ignorant" in their faith.

We arrived outside of the capital with the moon rising above us. With the assistance of British and French equipment left over from the initial revolt, we made quick work of the defences set up to defend Ha'il. Our soldiers swept into the city, securing strategic positions that would enable the bulk of our army to march into the downtown center. The close-quarters combat suited our fighting strengths, and within hours, Ha'il had been liberated. Emir el-Kader had tried to escape the city, but the marksmen placed surrounding the city were able to down his Druze bodyguards and camel rather quickly. With that, Jabal Shammar had fallen.

Now that I had seen Druze mysticism first-hand, few things have left me more unsure of my own destiny. One image struck me as we walked triumphantly into the administrative district: a crescent moon above a figure surrounded in a white flame, with an index finger pointed upward, and in the center of their chest, a crown within a star; in Arabic text beneath the painting, "A revelation of things to come." Though the Arabs cheered our success, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of fatalism. Where is this revolt destined to lead me towards in the end?

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Communications between Ha'il and Damascus were established in the days and weeks following our successful conquest of Jabal Shammar. Dire news had opened up on the international front: it seems our time has run out to stall off a larger invasion from the Allied Powers. France, Britain, Italy, and Greece were demanding our participation in the upcoming League of Nations³¹ organization, where likely the first agenda item would be to decide what parcels of Arabia would be divided between the Great Powers.

Prince Faisal was adamant on enforcing the agreement struck between the late Hussein bin Ali and Britain over the guarantee of Arab independence. He had even threatened to intervene in the Ottoman Civil War against the Allied Powers if they were to ignore our demands for sovereignty. By the time I established contact with Damascus, it seemed the tide of war was again roaring towards the shores of the peninsula.

We had contingency plans in place to prevent unexpected Allied invasions from Palestine and Mesopotamia, but it occurred to us at this hour that the best position for peace would be from a position of strength. The day had come where I had to make a final decision between staying loyal to Britain or indulging in my fantasies of Arabia, for certainly a preemptive strike would bring our end, and my name branded as a national traitor.

I had a long conversation with General Allenby, who had been assigned a new command dealing with British involvement in the Ottoman conflict. General Allenby heaped praise upon my service, declaring that I would be knighted if I returned to England. I merely replied that I did what had to be done in the moment, never hesitating the call to action. General Allenby replied, saying that the choice is made every day to follow through on one's duty and one's obligation to the right thing. "They are often the same, but when they are not, in that space of uncertainty is where true leaders emerge." That sense of uncertainty over my own identity had haunted me from the beginning of this rebellion, and now, I had to make my choice, and I chose to fight for the Truth.

Prince Abdullah began his assault on Palestine, quickly pushing the remaining British army past the Suez Canal in a desperate retreat. Our army ascended towards Baghdad, and from town to town, the Arab populace joined our efforts. They were thankful to be free from foreign occupation. We arrived in January at Kut, a city that I had visited during the very beginning of my time in the armed service. This place was the precursor to our rebellion, the first city to throw off the chains of the Ottomans. Many lessons were learned from the British failure to liberate Mesopotamia³², and we had mastered them. The British retreated into Persia and Kuwait³³, some from the warning sirens preceding our arrival.

Our attacks were met with great apprehension by the Allied Powers. The Great War had ended, and few were willing to wage another one on behalf of the colonialists or the Zionists. Issues were sent to individual colonies like Egypt to declare "military actions" against our "occupation of rightful Christian clay", but few leaders have been willing to heed these calls of act. In their eyes, these commands were less military orders and more like statements of wish fulfillment.

Sensing the momentum shifting towards our side, Prince Faisal has forwarded an offer of peace to the newly-formed League of Nations: membership and cooperation in exchange for guarantees of territorial sovereignty. As we wait further response from the West, the time has arrived for me to return to Damascus. I do not know what the future holds for me, or for our newly-won freedom. I myself have become sick on this journey, every day my health weakening, yet my mind feels the closest it has ever been towards peace and serenity.

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NOTE: The final chapter of the book appears to be an epilogue.

The open sky above and glistening sands below is where the reflection of God could be found, the truth of whom was revealed living in this climate; the only force of refuge, and the only path to wisdom here. Through that principle, the Arab Revolt emerged, desiring to find their liberation from Ottoman bondage. Like the caliphates from the beginning of Islam, it was through this mystical nation-state and religious figure that salvation became manifest; a reflection of the heavenly oasis upon the chthonic reality of the desert, an eternal Arabia.

If I shall survive to see the promise land again, let these records show what sacrifices and tribulations were made for the dream of Arabia to become realized, a hope beyond all hope; for its people to be endowed with freedom and self-determination - for one can only survive in Arabia if he is determined. The accomplishments from our dream will resonate throughout history, and perhaps I along with it as legend; my transcendence.

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NOTE: This poem is beneath a depiction believed to resemble the Druze painting T.E Lawrence encountered in Ha'il.