Object Class:

No object class? :wah:

Hazard Types:

No hazards? :wah:

All subjects found to have been affected by

This is awkward to read, maybe say All subjects affected by

to be instructed in a cover story and released.

What does this mean?

is a device similar in appearance to a CAT scanner.

I could be wrong but I would use the word machine instead of device as I picture devices as smaller in size.

RPC-HHH was recovered from an abandoned research laboratory in ████ █████, which appears to have been developing RPC-HHH for commercial use. Documentation recovered during initial containment indicate that RPC-HHH was developed as a concentration tool for workplaces. However, as research continued, organizations wishing to use it for indoctrination attempted to purchase it. The last recovered document indicates that the researchers had begun dismantling the facility, and were going to destroy the prototype.

Agents first came to the laboratory after reports of strange behavior originating from █████████ reached personnel investigating unrelated phenomenon. During containment, approximately ██ local residents were found to have been affected. None of these subjects reported any recollection of RPC-HHH.
This should be a discovery.

Main crit

Alright, main criticism with the structure and concept:
Obvious things are the lack of an object class / hazards, but I'll assume that's intentional for now.

Containment Protocols

The containment protocols feel a little lacking. We're told about where documentation is stored, what affected subjects are supposed to be done with, and the research the Authority is doing (Which seems like it belongs in the description.) We are not, however, told about how RPC-HHH is stored, or where. Is it in a site? Can it not be moved from a public area? The containment protocols are lacking the protocols for containing the anomaly, so to speak.

Any documentation regarding RPC-HHH's design is to be archived with non-anomalous records.

What? Why? I may be misinterpreting this, but wouldn't the Authority want to store documents pertaining to an anomaly as anomalous records? It's also not too clear exactly what this means. Are you referring to storing them in a public non-anomalous database? Or just how they're stored internally in the Authority?

Description

Overall I also feel like the description is a bit lacking. We're not really told about how the anomaly may function. This can work normally, but it's never implied that the Authority has ever made any attempt to understand exactly how RPC-HHH affects a subject. It's also left a little unclear whether a subject is conscious but has no control over their body, or is attempting to get other people to undergo the same procedure simply as an impulse (or if they really believe it.)

We could use more detail about the exact process RPC-HHH uses to apply its effects to a human mind. Does it remotely rewire the brain? Maybe something along those lines?

Everything in the last two paragraphs

RPC-HHH was recovered from an abandoned research laboratory in ████ █████…

to

…None of these subjects reported any recollection of RPC-HHH.

Does not belong in the description. They belong in a separate piece of the article labeled Discovery:, placed similarly to an addendum. You can place this before or after the description, however I find that placing it before the description serves to tease the reader about what the anomaly does pretty well.

Also:

RPC-HHH was recovered from an abandoned research laboratory in ████ █████, which appears to have been developing RPC-HHH for commercial use.

Who did the research lab belong to? Maybe a GOI, maybe some random company, I dunno. It just feels weird to have nothing here if this was a lab developing an anomalous object.

Addendum HHH-A

This might be more of a nitpick, but the table should be put in a collapsible section. Makes the broad strokes of the article available at the first glance. Oh, and the table is broken. You may have put a space between the header and the body sections.

||~ Button ||~ Effect ||

|| body text || body text
Should be
||~ Button ||~ Effect ||
|| body text || body text

Eliminates the subject’s sense of taste or ability to experience hunger. Developing allergies to many types of food has also been documented.

"Nullifies subject's sense of taste and hunger. May also induce the development of various food allergies."

Induces temporary amnesties, during which the subject will only answer to the name “Edward” or “Edwina”.

"Induces temporary amnesia, causing subjects to only respond to the names "Edward" or "Edwina""

Induces permanent gender dysphoria, in subject’s already experiencing the condition they may increase worsening symptoms.

"Induces permanent gender dysphoria. Subjects possessing dysphoria prior to entering RPC-HHH are prone to experiencing worsening symptoms over time."

Causes delusions of experiencing hypertension and arthritis.

"Induces temporary symptoms of hypertension and arthritis.

The subject will be unable to recognize small distractions, such as background noise, changes in the air, and changes in temperature.

"Subjects will no longer notice minor changes in the surrounding environment."

Between the hours of 9:00 AM and 5:00 PM, the subject will be unable to remember anything about their identity, and will attempt to fulfill any task asked of them.

"Induces ego death between 0900 and 1700 hours. During this time, subjects will perform any instructions provided to them."

The subject will lose all tactile sensation.

"Induces loss of tactile senses."

Efficiency in typing, writing, and memory will increase, as well as creating total recall.

"Induces improvements in typing and writing abilities, as well as long-term and short-term memory."

The subject will be unable to experience hunger. Effects of starvation are not changed.

I personally think you should change this, due to it being similar to the effect of the A button.

Subject will lose feeling in their teeth and may begin believing that their bodies are composed from glass.

There are no nerve fibers in your teeth, as they themselves are part of your skeleton. When you touch your teeth, what you feel is the slight shifting inside your gums.
"Induces the belief that the subject is made of glass, and loss of feeling in the periodontal ligament."

Causes the subject to lose the ability to communicate verbally.

"Induces subject's vocal cords to cease function."

Causes colorblindness in the subject.

"Induces colorblindness."

Developing a delusion wherein the subject believes they have swallowed a glass piano which will shatter inside them if they move too vigorously.

"Subjects will refuse to move, claiming they have consumed a glass piano which may shatter upon movement."

Subject will show an increased aptitude for advanced scientific and mathematic concepts. This will not be an instant increase in intelligence, as subjects will be able to grasp advanced concepts, but show their normal aptitude for more basic ideas. In addition, the subject will show a significantly decreased aptitude in other fields of study. 11% of subjects have developed sociopathic personalities following exposure.

"Induces sociopathic personality traits, and a slow building of interest in advanced scientific and mathematical concepts."

Subject will lose their sense of self, and express loyalty to a "System Corrupted, Private", and identify any authority figures as representatives of that group. Mental functions such as creative thinking, problem solving, and sapient thought are inhibited.

Another ego death effect, similar to pad button 2. I'd recommend changing this, maybe removing the ego death part.

Introduces the hemophiliac gene into the subject’s DNA if it were not already present. Further testing is required to confirm this effect.

There is no such thing as a "hemophilia gene". Hemophilia is caused by a mutation in a gene, not the presence of another unique gene.
I don't really understand the last part of this effect. Further testing constitutes causing bleeding in a CSD personnel and seeing if it stops normally. No real reason to leave it ambiguous.

Addendum HHH-B

All requests to end research on RPC-HHH will be denied. Please direct any requests or concerns to the office of Dr. Spencer Knight.

Considering the actual content of Addendum HHH-B, this has little reason to be here. In fact, this kind of doesn't belong in the article. Maybe I'm totally wrong here and it absolutely does, but highlighting the fact that personnel specifically request to end testing of HHH doesn't really add anything IMO.

apparently via human fingernail scratching.

This has little reason to be here.

The collapsible text switches from "Note" to "Access granted". Feels unfinished, like there was supposed to be a security clearance request or something.

Okay, let's talk about the note!

I do not understand what the exact purpose of this note is.
It's warning us about some people, maybe the Authority, maybe a GOI, we don't really know.
The author claims this was supposed to help a workplace of some kind, then goes on to say it's for science.
Ignoring the fact that this note has had little to no buildup, it's not exactly clear what anyone would want RPC-HHH for. None of the effects, except for maybe button 0 and #, are particularly useful to anyone.

I'm really not trying to be rude, but Addendum B just isn't very purposeful. I feel like it's supposed to imply this thing was made by the Authority when coupled with the note, but there's absolutely no buildup to this reveal.

Overall, it feels like the unstructured ramblings of a madman. And hey, if that's what you were going for, that's great. But all in all, I really do think it should be removed. This is an object capable of standing on it's own, and the extra lore tacked onto it doesn't really feel warranted or necessary.

I am going to say, though, that it seems like a baseline effect of RPC-HHH is obeying orders. It appears to be your intention, anyway. Number pad 2's effect sort of muddles this a bit by implying that subjects will only obey orders when under that specific number's effects.

Awkward wording / grammar

Figured I'd give this it's own little segment.
I'd love to comb through the article and find every example of the wording being slightly off or awkward and tell you how to fix it, but I'm gonna level with you, I've been doing this crit for about 4 hours now. It's late, I'm more than a little tired.

So I'm gonna just compile all the weird sentences I can find for you, just so you know they could use some work.

Containment Protocols

All subjects found to have been affected by RPC-HHH are to be instructed in a cover story and released.

And that's all for the containment protocols! There's not a lot to critique. As I said earlier, they could use some expansion.

Description

The interior mechanism, however, is comprised of computer and medical equipment without a clearly functioning design.

Remove "however". Replace "equipment" with "parts". The last part could use a little work.

A controller device is attached to RPC-HHH, originally designed for use with the Atari Jaguar video gaming console.

"An Atari Jaguar controller is attached to RPC-HHH" or something similar works fine.

When a human subject enters RPC-HHH it enters an active state.

"RPC-HHH enters an active state once a human subject is inserted."

If any buttons on the controller are pressed during that time the subject will exit with permanent changes to their personality, mental aptitude, and cognition depending on which buttons were pressed.

"If any buttons on the associated controller during RPC-HHH's active state, the subject will exit with permanent changes applied to their psyche."

Subjects affected by RPC-HHH will, subsequently to exposure, attempt to have it affect as many subjects as possible.

"subsequently to exposure" can be removed.
"Subjects affected by RPC-HHH will attempt to persuade unaffected subjects into entering RPC-HHH." or something similar.

This will continue until they are unable to find additional unaffected subjects, or are given an order.

Wait wait wait wait, maybe this doesn't belong here, but don't subjects only obey orders if number pad 2 is pressed?

RPC-HHH was recovered from an abandoned research laboratory in ████ █████, which appears to have been developing RPC-HHH for commercial use.

I don't know if I'd use "appears" here, since it seems pretty clear that they were given the following sentences. Oh, speaking of which!

However, as research continued, organizations wishing to use it for indoctrination attempted to purchase it. The last recovered document indicates that the researchers had begun dismantling the facility, and were going to destroy the prototype.

You might be able to get away with removing this. Overall though, it sounds very floaty, almost like it's telling a story rather than an outlined fact of events. But yeah, this part is kinda lore heavy and does a bad job of hiding it.

The interior mechanism, however, is comprised of computer and medical equipment.

I struggle to picture how this differs from a regular CAT scanner.

It functions despite having no clear linear functionality or external power source.

Couldn't the scanner provide it with power?

The last recovered document indicates that the researchers had begun dismantling the facility, and were going to destroy the prototype.

The idea that this is a prototype and not finished isn't reflected by the rest of the article. It functions perfectly well.

Very personal take here, but the use of the note/journal at the end to spell out the background of the article feels like a hackneyed and uninteresting approach. Most of these conclusions could be reached by providing a more extensive background of the anomaly, or maybe through special idiosyncrasies in how it works.

interred in hospitals treating mental illness or other care facilities under Authority supervision when practical

committed in institutions treating mental disorders or other care facilities under Authority supervision when practical.

archived with non-anomalous records

archived within non-anomalous records.

currently in the planning stages

currently being considered

Induces temporary amnesties

temporary amnesia

Subject will begin suffering from an eating disorder such as bulimia.

The subject will begin…

or if present they become more acute

or, if present, they increase of said beliefs.