the area of RPC-354 or to be either captured
are to be either captured
terminated, those that have been captured
I'd personally replace the comma with a period and capitalize Those.
a cover story will be given to next of kin
given to their next of kin
creature appears In
Replace creature with entity for clinicality sake and make In lowercase.
what appears to be
Going to take a second to help you out with a common rookie mistake. You should only use "what appears to be" when the Authority is unsure of something. For example, if an entity is difficult to clearly see and you can't determine details, then you would use "appears to be". In your article, you use this phrase several times in spite of several details that can be easily determined. For example "appears to be dark black on the rooftop" unless there is some reason the Authority can't get an aerial view of the facility, than you would NOT use "appears to be" here.
The Inside bears a resemblance to the labyrinthian maze from the Greek mythological tale of the Minotaur
I don't think the Authority would straight up reference mythology like this unless it was an absolutely sure connection. I would remove this section and replace it with something along the lines of "The interior of RPC-354 is labyrinthian with multiple hallways…"
and Beds suggesting
and beds, suggesting
RPC-354 along with manifesting a Person's perfect vacation but can also manipulate itself to be able to accustom the person's desired hotel room.
RPC-354 can not only manifest a person's perfect vacation but can also,
the main lobby this effect does
lobby. This effect
within the lobby, upon arrival reality around
lobby. Upon arrival, reality around
However, it is still advised to deter anyone from entering RPC-354 unless they are research staff or CSD personnel.
This is another common rookie mistake. A sentence like this feels out of place in the description, and belongs more in the containment procedures. I am not stating that you should move it there, I believe it is better that you remove it from the article.
And photos of a large black sphere with a picture of a distorted Albanian politician started circulating the European net
Try not to start sentences with "And". Replace it with "This coincided with photos".
I would rewrite this sentence like this
**This coincided with other images that captured the Authorities attention such as a large black sphere spotted in [REDACTED] and distorted images of [REDACTED], a controversial former Albanian politician.
You can use black boxes too if you'd like.
The authority was quick to locate RPC-354
Remember to capitalize "Authority" when in reference to the RPC Authority.
that was First sighted
first
exploration team Charlie
Charlie? As in the MST? If you are referencing some form of MST, then I would reccomend you use one from the Pre-Existing MST List instead of making up a new one. November-12 is a perfect candidate for this as they explore anomalous areas with spatially large interiors such as the one featured in your draft.
If you are going to replace "exploration team Charlie" with MST November-12, then I would remove references to Uniform-1 as they probably would not be necessary just yet since this is the initial exploration.
spoke in a strange language with a monotone voice
Strange is extremely vague for the Authority to use. Perhaps you could say that they spoke in an uknown language or they spoke in a language identified as belonging from an alternate universe.
security personnel attempted to prevent the robot from accessing the terminal but this was unsuccessful
I, personally, find it rather hard to believe that some old rust bucket would have easily made it through several armed guards and somehow connected to a terminal that might not even be compatible with the machinary from his home world.
and researcher Dr.[REDACTED] told the robotic figure that it was in a makeshift site nearby RPC-354
Why is this researcher ignoring OPSEC? This seemingly intelligent entity has just breached a site, stormed past several security guards, and gained access to sensitive data. So why in the world is the Authority not trying to capture him, much less telling him more information about the Authority?
The Interview Log
There is a massive formatting issue with this one. Each sentence is stored in a quote block rather than it being one huge quote block with line breaks seperating each speaker
Your quote blocks look like this when they should look more like this which will be much more aesthetically pleasing.
The test log also suffer from something similar with having no line breaks. Don't feel bad, me and many others had difficulties with quoteblocks at first as well.
I will end my SPAG criticism here.