It's a funny idea with a funny title and an interesting focus on a single hazard (though this article actually predates the hazards system). Unfortunately, the rest is bland. The one thing I'll give it is that it was far too short for me to get tired of, but just because I didn't feel ire towards it doesn't mean it worked out.
The sandbox log almost went somewhere, but then the article closes off with a pointless discovery log. It was probably serviceable for the time, but that time is long past. 1/5
There's something down there, I'm appealing for reclassification to beta. -Dr. █████
That's not how Beta is used.